Interracial Marriage

On June 19th, we celebrate "Loving Day."  It's in celebration of the 1967 supreme court decision that made it illegal for states to ban interracial marriages.  It's hard for me to believe that just over 40 years ago, my darling husband and I would not have been able to be married in either of our home states.  But thankfully, that was 1967.  NINETEEN SIXTY SEVEN.

Today, a friend of mine who is married to a multiracial gentleman posted an article on Facebook about a church in KY that banned mixed race couples.

Are. You. Freaking. Kidding. Me.????

When I consider that there was once a day where I couldn't marry Mr. Right I think it's just nutty.  Really - it seems so weird to me.  Especially since 90% of the time I forget that he's Asian.  When people ask, "Where's your husband from?" and I answer, "Chicago originally," he has to remind me that that's not what they are asking.  I just forget because it's so not a big deal.  I hope my friends in the LGBT community will be able to feel the same way about their marriages.  That it was silly that people judged their relationships and tried to take them out of being.  But I guess I was just super naive to think that interracial relationships were well accepted now.

It appears that a few people in the church found the mere sight of this couple to be atrocious.  It all started when a seemingly lovely, well educated engaged couple led the congregation in song.  The pastor approached the woman's father and told him they were no longer welcome to sing at the church.  When the gentleman protested, it was put to a vote and the vote actually freaking passed.  The vote decided that they could worship at the church, but they couldn't be involved in services (you know, when people have to look at them) or be official members. Oh wait - they can be involved in funerals.  The church says it's in an effort to promote "greater unity."  WTF?

Now, I realize that a white/Asian marriage is probably more socially friendly than a white/black marriage.  But back in the day, the limits on interracial marriage we just that - interracial.  Not black, yellow, red, white, purple - just two people of different races could not marry.  In this day and age we do get funny looks sometimes in public, but I just chalk it up to us being short.  Face it, we shorties look kinda weird.  Especially in pairs.  I recognize the look of shock of the faces of the families I work with when they see our wedding photo on my desk for the first time, but they get over it quickly and that's that.  It's just a surprise is all.  They probably had him pictured in their heads and he was a white guy.  But day in and day out, we do not face any discrimination so to speak.  I have never really felt judged.  I think that the weird comments people make about it are kind of funny because they are so bizarre and ignorant that you just have to laugh. ("You'll have Jon and Kate kids!" "Can your mother-in-law pronounce your name?")  So I can't really imagine what it feels like to be this couple.  To be sharing your gift of song with a Christian worship community and then to be told you aren't welcome because they see something morally wrong with your relationship.  And the only thing they are seeing is the color of your skin.

I'm proud to be in an interracial marriage.  I'm proud to share two cultures and I'm excited about making our own merge of traditions to share with our child(ren).  We get to share our cultures with our extended families.  Both of our families learned so much in the wedding planning process - it was great!  Most of all, we plan on having a gorgeous hapa baby whose mere existence screams, "These people made me because they love each other."

Screw you random baptist church in Kentucky.  You don't know what you're missing out on by shunning this couple.

Okay, gotta run.  They are talking about freezing eggs on Whitney.