Several months ago I wrote a post about Cytomegalovirus(CMV). Long story short, it’s a minor virus, but if
you contract it for the first time during pregnancy, if can have anywhere from
zero to severe implications for your child.
Before we started trying for a baby, I tested negative, meaning I’d
never had it. It was important to me to get
tested because I work with children who have congenital CMV every day and many
of them are still actively shedding the virus.
I was tested because I thought I’d test positive and then there would be
nothing to worry about. Turns out, I was
CMV negative.
As soon as I got my beta results, I asked my RE about
it. He wanted to test me again since it
had been a couple of years. Hopefully
just the right kid had sneezed on me and I could go about my merry way. Sadly, I’m still negative. I have to stop seeing all of my congenital
CMV little ones.
What’s scary is that we don’t always know which kids have
the virus when we first see them. We
test their blood spot cards from birth and it often takes about 6 months to get
those results. Plus we know that it’s
likely that the congenital CMV kids are shedding the virus, but any kid could
walk it with it at any time. So really,
avoiding the kids we know about is just a band-aid on a gaping wound, but it’s better than nothing.
So it means my boss and all of my immediate coworkers know
because they have to pick up the slack.
I’m fine with that. After all,
they’ve been there through every transfer and every beta. What I’m not fine with is the message it’s
sending to the families I work with.
Of course we aren't going to come out and say, "Lisa can no longer see your child because of the possibility of contracting CMV," but they’re going to figure it out. I see these kids several times a year, and all the
sudden they’re going to be seeing another clinician for no apparent reason. They’ll see a growing belly on me in the hallway and it will
sink in. I feel like I’m sending a
message that says, “You could’ve avoided your child’s deafness.” Not only do I not believe that, I don’t want
to make anyone feel that way.
It’s just yucky.
Unavoidable, but yucky.
OH this is a hard place to be in. I too have to avoid certain patients and parents wonder why. I feel bad, but here's the thing: You HAVE to do what is right for you and your baby. Most people don't even know what CMV is or how it is contracted. It's a rough place to be and I can totally empathize with you. Wishing it was different, but you've worked so SO hard for this baby, it's only fair for you to do EVERYTHING you can to ensure his/her safety. HUGS hon!
ReplyDeleteSo tough! I felt like I was abandoning my kids this year but they all totally understand. I'm sure the ones you work with will too.
ReplyDeleteThis has to be so hard. Good for you for doing what you know is right for your family. I hope it gets better!
ReplyDeleteDefinitely worth the precaution. x
ReplyDeleteYou have to do what's best for you and your little one. I get the fear that you're sending the wrong message to your families, but hopefully they won't see it that way. I'm sure, once they figure out what's going on, they'll be rooting for you, too!
ReplyDeleteUgh. I've assumed many times that I would be CMV positive because of my exposures previously, but I guess not necessarily!
ReplyDeleteCOULD they have avoided it, though?? I mean, the only way you are even possibly able to avoid it right now is that you have blood test results of the children around you - information that nobody has in general. I don't know if that is the message you would be sending. It doesn't change it from being a yucky kind of uncomfortable situation but I don't think you are saying that at all. <3
ReplyDelete